How and why to check with yourself

Let’s face it, this year totally sucks. With the coronavirus floating in the air, along with layoffs, furloughs, budget cuts, etc. On top of that, many of us have our kids at home with us to learn remotely. If you have more than one child, you may know how difficult this can be. Do you also work from home? It can pile on top of everything else and you can feel like the walls are closing in on you. Don’t worry, you are do not the only mom out there who feels like that.

Many of us have a lot to do at home and at work, and kids at school, making sure they get all their homework done on time can be a bit of a pain, to say the least. can say. You may feel like you are on the verge of a nervous breakdown. But there are some things you can do to check with yourself before something like this happens.

Ground yourself

Grounding is a technique where you take a moment to recognize your surroundings. It helps you stay in the present moment. Check with yourself, are you safe where you are now? If so, continue with your grounding process. It may be different for each person.

For example, you can use your five senses, sight, smell, touch, hearing and taste. Are you on a chair? What is the chair made of? Are you currently eating? What does it taste like? What do you feel? By doing these activities, you take a step back and realize that everything is fine for the moment. You put your mind elsewhere. As stated earlier, an anchoring process may look different for everyone, what works for one person may not work for another. Find one that works for you.


Journaling has a myriad of benefits. When you can find time for yourself, even if it’s just for a few minutes, you can collect your thoughts. Write them down. By doing this, you are able to go back to what you have written and what is bothering or upsetting you. This helps you identify your triggers or what gets on your nerves. By doing so, you are able to find out what is bothering you and find ways to avoid it in the future.

Find your trigger

Is it just one thing that can bother you or is it a multitude of things that bother you? Is this something that has been building for quite a while now, or is it something that just happened suddenly and hits you like a ton of bricks?

If you can do this, you will be able to learn more about yourself and find out what is really going on in your mind at that moment. But you have to be aware not to dive headfirst into your feelings. Try a grounding technique once you identify it. Next, examine your feelings, don’t rush into them, but rather explore them.

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Focus on your breathing

Take a moment, however small, and let everything else in your mind drift away. Concentrate for a moment on your breathing. Inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth. By bringing attention to your breath, you take attention away from what is bothering you and turn it into something else.

As stated, no matter how small the moment you can grasp, taking full, deep breaths can help you let go of what’s bothering you. A wonderful book you can pick up to learn all about breathing and its myriad of benefits is Breath by James Nestor on Amazon.

Ask yourself questions

Reduce any mental noise you may be feeling right now. Get rid of all judgment, all that bothers you. It helps to “check in” with yourself by asking and answering questions. They take you away from what’s bothering you and can lead you to find answers on how to deal with what’s going on right now. Some questions you can ask yourself are:

  • How do I feel?
  • Am I safe?
  • Why do I feel this way?
  • Do I have emotional needs?
  • How can I meet these emotional needs?
  • What can I do to feel better?

By answering these questions, you can learn more about yourself. You will be able to be introspective with yourself and you will be able to give yourself the answers you may have been looking for. It can be a big help when you’re feeling upset.

Use an app to calm down

We live in such an amazing world today. There are many apps that can help bring you back to the present moment and be aware of your surroundings, emotions, thoughts, etc. You can find a wide variety of them in the App Store and Google Play, so give them a look to check them out and see if there’s one that you think could help you.

READ NEXT: 7 clues and clues you might be an overworked mom

Sources: WhoWhatWear, Advice Directory, RCCAustin

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